19 March 2005

Why, oh why, do I do this???

I decided to start my program back up on Monday; I don't know, there's just something about Mondays that seem so fresh and a great place to start.

So for lunch I had a Jack in the Box Southwest Chicken salad and a LARGE Crunchy Malted Candy Shake. A LARGE!! Not a Medium or even a Small; A fucking LARGE!!!!!! I mean seriously, what the fuck was I thinking?????? That shake was more calories than the salad WITH dressing!!! I'm a freaking moron sometimes!!!! Because of this fucking shake, my calorie count for the day is 4100!!! 4100!!!! That's almost 3 days of calories. Now I won't be able to eat at all tomorrow.... No, not really but that's what I feel like. Oh yeah, well I could have thrown some of it away but did I?? NO!!!!! I drank the whole fucking thing!!!! Okay, enough beating myself up. I just needed a little self-flogging!!!!!

I plan to straighten my eating out tomorrow. I'm going to get up in the morning and go for a walk or a bike ride, and them probably go out to breakfast with Charlie nd then do my shopping for the week. After that it will be home and housework the rest of the day. NO FAST FOOD!!!!

Okay, enough. More later.......

And the day started so well.

Sunrise on the surface of one of Saturn's moon. That's what this picture reminds me of. I really wish I could see a sunrise like that here. I am so tired of the cold. It was much warmer last night and today but it's still a little chilly. I want a warm Hawaiian day with tradewinds and everything.

So I got up this morning and jumped on the treadmill. I did 35 minutes at a really good pace. I read in Runner's World that you shouldn't run under 4.5 mph; you just don't burn enough calories and in fact you may burn less. So I walked at around 3.8 and really worked up a sweat. Then I ate well all day. Then I got home :( I ate about 1/4 bag of Cheez-Its and a good sized dinner. Oh yeah, and then a muffin for dessert. Tomorrow is weigh-in day, this may get ugly!!

I have a really clear vision of what I want to look like though (and I think it's completly doable). I tried to link it here but screwed it up completely. But I know what I want now; really know. I have worked the last 2 days on formulating a training schedule. I'm still doing Bob Greene's 12 week makeover but I'm starting serious running.

Well, I've had enough. I think I'm off to bed.......

17 March 2005


Do not eat just toast in the morning. I had 1/2 a roll with butter when I got up this morning instead of my usual 1/2 banana. Now my blood sugar is doing nasty things and I don't like it. Apparently eating refined, white bread in the morning causes a spike in blood sugar approximately 2 hours later. Definitely not good. Do NOT do that again!!!!!

Here we are at Thursday again.

I refuse to feel bad but I can't help feeling just a little down on myself. Monday my left knee hurt so bad that I decided not to exercise on Tuesday. That definitely helped and Wednesday my knee felt much better. I got up yesterday and did a nice slow, easy walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes; my knee twinged a little bit but nothing serious and my knee felt fine all day. Last night I had a dinner meeting and didn't get home until 9:15 pm so there was no exercise last night. This morning I just didn't want to get up and gave in very, very easy to sleeping in. Now, my knee is still twinging a little bit and I could probably justify not exercising, but that's really an excuse. I didn't exercise because I was lazy. So I have to be very vigilant and force myself to exercise and get back in the habit. It's way too easy to fall out of the routine. Actually, sometimes I can take a day off and get right back into it the following day; and sometimes I can't. I wonder what the difference is? Is it my attitude? Is it the phase of the moon? What? Oh well, this is apparently never going to come really easy to me so I have to keep focused on the goal. Well, I must get my butt to work.....

15 March 2005

I refuse to feel guilty

because I did not exercise this morning. I got up yesterday and tried to do some step aerobics only to have my left knee become so painful I could not put any weight on it. I had to stop 30 mins into it. I took ibuprofen all day and last night my knee felt good until we walked the dogs. They were very hyper and started running which set my knee off again. I did manage to do my strength and functional exercises with no pain or problems. But my knee was sore the rest of the night. When the alarm went off this morning I could feel my knee was a little sore as I stretched in bed. So I decided to pass on exercise this morning, since it was running and that set my knee off yesterday, and just take it easy. If my knee feels better I can always do it tonight or I can use this as my rest day. I will take ibuprofen all day to reduce the internal swelling and it should be fine tonight or tomorrow at the latest. I am not going to feel guilty!!! I need to get my knee better so I don't seriously damage it. Okay, I feel better now and can go on with my day :)

13 March 2005


I just finished my 10k and am sitting here at work waiting for the samples so I can go home. I had such a good run I can't believe it. I averaged 11 minute miles and completed the 10k in 1:11. I'm really stoked about it. I ran with my mp3 player; which I loaded last night with some great music; and it made all the difference. I was singing along and having a great time. The music prevent the sounds of pain from coming through. I loved it. I had forgotten how great it was to run with music; absolutely awesome........

That's really all I have to say. I'm on a kind of high from the run :) I'm a little bummed because my age group is so big. I came in 7 in my age group. Most groups don't even have 3, mine has like 10 :( Oh well, I'll just have to become a better runner......

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