07 January 2006

Okay, slow down...

Woke up a little sore this morning. Really feel it in the back and butt. I may have overdone it just a little yesterday but it felt good. Tomorrow I have a 5k race that I have a real chance of placing in my age group. Keep your fingers crossed.

I have a confession to make here. I am shy. Painfully shy. I will avoid doing things because I feel so uncomfortable in new situations. I have to force myself to do things and to talk to people. It gets really tough sometimes. When I was on vacation I did a Resolution Run on Jan. 1 and I had to talk myself through it the whole time (hubby had tickets to the 9er game so I was on my own). In spite of the wind and rain and cold and miserable conditions, I had a great time and met some really nice people. But I had to force myself to do it. Part of the problem is I doubt myself - a lot! I tend to think I'm not good enough or fast enough or interesting enough or whatever enough and I let those negative thoughts win sometimes. So, one of my goals this year is to do something outside of my comfort zone once a month (I'd like to do it once a week but I think I'll start slow). I've already done something this month by doing the Resolution Run BUT I'm not going to count that. Next week I have a biathlon. Now I have not swum in over 3 months (acutally since my freak out at the tri) so I'm going to have to squeeze some swimming in this week. This is way, way out of my comfort zone. I will probably be the last one out of the water but hey, someone has to be last right?? I have to start working on this mentally now or I will chicken out. Okay, there it is, it's out there. Most people who know me have no idea about this. I come off as very strong and confident and bold but I'm not. Inside I'm scared and shy and constantly doubting myself. Well, I've been like this for 46 years, I think it's time to get over it, don't you?? By the way, this is also the year for me to totally get honest with myself (I usually am but I want to be even moreso).

06 January 2006

New Year, New Me...

Yeah, cheesy I know but this is going to be a great year, I can feel it.

Before I left on vacation I ordered a bike trainer, a CycleOps Mag Trainer to be specific, it came while I was gone and I just picked it up at the lab today. Okay, this thing is the bomb!!! I absolutely love it!!!! I set it up and rode it while I watched my DVR'd episodes of All My Children. What's better???? Getting a bike ride in and watching my soaps, hello - can you say heaven!!!!! So that is a huge hit.

Also before I left I was diagnosed with hypoglycemia. I've had problems with my blood sugar for years but the training last year really exacerbated the problem. I'm scheduled to see a nutritionist on the 17th but in the meantime I ordered Hypoglycemia for Dummies. I was reading that this afternoon and it turns out this condition is much worse than I thought. Turns out the depression I dance with and fatigue and a couple of other issues may be all related to the hypoglycemia. That's good to know but it pisses me off no one ever mentioned it before. I thought everyone had these wild swings in blood sugar all the time. Anyway, that looks promising. It's funny how you can get used to things. I have lived with this condition for so long that it was a way of life for me. It never really occurred to me that this could be controlled. And it's not that I haven't heard about hypoglycemia, it's just I really didn't think I had it. Silly, I know.

I also ordered a book recommended by Bold; Eat Right to Train Right by Chris Carmichael. It hasn't arrived yet but I figure between these 2 books and the nutritionist weight loss and fuel for training is well within my grasp.

Still recovering from the vacation. Got up this morning and ran 3.5 miles then did Core Performance, also, rode the trainer for 20 minutes. Overall an excellent day.

Starting using FitDay again and totaled out the calories at 1550 for the day. The goal is to stay around 1500 a day and to rack up at least 400 minutes of exercise a week. I have got to get back to swimming and really soon since I have a biathlon next weekend.

One thing I really want to focus on this year (focus, get it :) is the positive. So, along those lines, I'm going to try and do like a gratitude item everyday. For today, I'm grateful for my dogs. Since the kids are grown they have become our kids. While we were gone I thought about them all the time. The oldest one, Mana, is 14 years old, deaf, blind, and has severe arthritis in her hips. Our neighbor watched her for us while we boarded the other 2. Last night we took them on the usual walk and Mana couldn't make it. She stopped a couple of times and just sat down and we had to carry her some of the way. It was really sad to see. It made me realize though how grateful I am to have had the honor of knowing all these dogs. They are sweet, loving, friendly dogs who would lay down their lives in a second for me. They love me completely, unconditionally and get so happy to see me they can't stand it. Have you ever seen a 90 lb dog wag his entire butt in joy??? There's nothing like it. I know in the next few weeks we'll have to face the decision of what to do with Mana and it's not a decision I look forward to, but it has made me realize how much these dogs add to my life. They have taught me that right now is the best moment. Right now is a great time to love, laugh, play and be happy. People who treat pets as possessions have no idea what they are missing out on.. I would rather spend time with my dogs than with many people I know.

05 January 2006

I'm Baaaaaaccccckkkkkkkkk!


Hope everyone had a great holiday season (whatever one you may celebrate). We had a fantastic trip but I sure am glad to be home. I got a lot of rest and am really ready to get going. We did all the touristy things that you never do when you live in an area; it was so fun.. More details later. I'm still unpacking, uploading my pictures, getting the dogs settled, and easing back into the real world. I'll write a longer post tomorrow with some pictures.

Social media holiday

I've decided to take a break from social media. I spend far, far too much time just scrolling through Facebook. Yes, I get a lot of in...