22 June 2011

Sometimes I'm a little


slow. Seriously. I consider myself an extremely bright person. I have a pretty sharp mind withe the ability to use reason and logic like a weapon. But sometimes, sometimes, I can be slow on the uptake.

I have pretty much given up on serious binging. The kind where I eat until my stomach hurts and I don't want to eat for 3 days after. Seriously. I could consume 1,000 or more calories in the course of an hour or so when I was in the frenzy of binge. I hated it. So while I no longer do that, I still have my moments where I break down an have a tiny binge. Maybe I'll have McDonald's for breakfast or lunch. Maybe I'll get donuts on my way home from work. Really not that serious in the grand scheme of things but still a binge. One of the things that happens in my head when I have one of these binges is why? Why do i still do this? Why can I not resist the lure of the Golden Arches? Why? Why? Why? And I've never been able to satisfactorily answer that question to myself.

This morning I felt like working out but then I got involved in some school work and time got away from me. So as I'm getting ready to leave the house I thought I would like Burger King for breakfast. I really didn't need it but it sounded kind of good. As I drove towards work I zipped right past the Burger King. Darn!!!! Well, there's McD's near the school, I figured I'd go there. Then the thought of a bagel popped into my head. Then I thought I don't want that many carbs, they make me feel bloated and gassy. Then I got to thinking about how carb loaded McD's breakfast is. Then I started talking myself out of it. And out of the bagel. And into something that wouldn't make me feel like crap. I ended up bypassing McD's, going into Safeway and getting a little fruit and cheese platter they had. There were about 6 small cubes of cheese, a handful of grapes, 1/2 an apple, and a small container of low fat caramel sauce. I bought that, and only that, and ate it and it was absolutely perfect. I'm a little concerned about the caramel sauce since it's main ingredient was high fructose corn syrup, but other than that it was good.

So I realized that if I take my time and not give in to impulse, I will make a good choice. I generally get these cravings or desires when I'm on the move. If there is a store within 5-10 minutes, I'm screwed because I'll stop and give into the craving. If I have to go 15 minutes or more, I can generally talk myself down. Perhaps that wait 20 minutes before eating has a grain of truth to it???

The moral of this story, when I crave junk in any fashion, I will wait at least 20 minutes before giving in to it.

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