15 April 2022

Another trip around the sun

 Today is my 63rd birthday. I'm not that big on birthdays, they are something I never quite understood completely. I didn't do anything but be born on this date and I managed to not die over the past 365 days. I can understand celebrating babies birthdays, for most of our history them lasting the first year was iffy. So a joyous celebration because they did last that first year makes sense. But me because I've survived 63 years? Nah, not that big a deal. 

But I do like to use it, like I use the new year, to kind of reflect back a little on the past year. This year has been a good one, it really has. I feel like I have grown as a person immensely. I feel like I've grown as a teacher immensely. I feel like I'm finally getting the habit of this whole adulting thing. Still not mastered it, but getting better at it. 

This past year has seen a lot of me letting go of things. Not really goals or dreams, but unrealistic expectations. For example, up until very recently (within the last few years) I've always felt like I had to be working towards something. I had to have a goal that I was very actively pursuing or what was the point. And those goals or pursuits would literally consume my life and not allow me one minutes rest. They also kept me looking towards the future and not living in the moment. With much mindfulness I've managed to give that up. I tend to live much more in the moment now, though it's still a work in progress, and while I still have goals they are not all consuming. I take the time to read and watch TV because I enjoy those things. I work on myself and getting better because I enjoy those things. So yes, this past year really has been a year of growth and mindfulness that I am extremely grateful for. 

I think back to my 20s and am amazed. I never thought I would live this long. I say that a lot but it's true. In my 20s I could never imagine being 60. Plus with the things I was doing in my 20s the odds were against me. But somehow I got my act together and here I am 63 and actually pretty healthy. Still got some things to work on, but I'm in this for the long haul. 

Okay, that is me summing up my thoughts on my birthday. Now it's time to take on the day. Who am I kidding? It's Friday, time to go read. 

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