06 February 2005

What do you REALLY want???

That saying is put up at our Weight Watchers meeting every week and you know how things go, you see something so often you stop seeing it. Well some things this week has caused me to do some major thinking and reevaluating things in my life.

First, I really slacked this week. I didn't exercise near as much as I should have and my eating sucked most of the week.

Second, I had a race this morning and I did way worse than I planned on (of course the not exercising may have something to do with that!!!!)

Third, our WW meeting was about getting a vision of yourself at your goal.

These three seemingly unrelated things have caused major thought processes. I think what's been lacking, and thereby undermining myself, is that vision of myself at goal. Because I don't have that vision getting up out of bed every morning to exercise is harder than it should be; and following WW is definitely harder than it should be. That is why I did so poorly at the race this morning. I had set a goal of 50 minutes and ended up coming in at 55 minutes. Not the end of the world but a let down.

I need a vision of myself at goal. Something that will inspire me to get my butt out of bed in the morning - every morning!!!! So, what do I really want? I want to be thin, but that's too vague. I want to be cut; that's a little more specific but still not concrete enough. I want a flat stomach, but I'm not sure that will ever happen and I don't want to set myself up for failure. So what do I want. I have clothes I want to fit into. I have things I want to do. Okay, let's try some on for size.

I want to fit into and look fabulous in the pink pin-striped pants.

I want to run the Honolulu Marathon in 4 hours.

I want to place in my age group in a race.

I think I need to work on my image and vision because I really believe that is what is missing from my journey. I'm not sure how to move forward from here but I don't think I can until I get this vision down.

Okay, I clearly need to continue to mull this over.

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