Regrouping

Over the past couple of years a whole bunch of routines have been developed around the dogs. We had the medicine routine, both Nala and Rocco were on a couple of different meds. We had the feeding routines, neither of them were great eaters at the end so meals had to be fixed with gravy, leftover meat, anything to make it more appealing. We were constantly boiling something for the dogs. There was the biscuit routine. Not only did I have to make their biscuits, they preferred mine to store bought, but there was a whole routine about getting them. They would eat breakfast or dinner and get one. Then before I left in the morning they got a second one. Or after I cleaned the kitchen at night they got a second one. Then there was the milk routine. After dinner every night I have a small glass of milk. Nala and Rocco had to share it with me and I always had to keep track of who got it first (it alternated) because it was like they remembered. There were so many others I could go on for days. But most of them I never even noticed until they were gone. Sunday night after dinner I sat down to have my glass of milk and there was no one to share it with. When I went shopping on Sunday I automatically reached for the pill pockets because that's the only way Rocco would take his pills, only to start crying in the store and put them back. No need for them anymore. So now I feel at loose ends. All of my routines are gone and I'm a little lost. You don't realize how big a place someone takes in your life until they are gone. When we lost Nala I still had Rocco for all the routines. Now I have no one. The fosters are still learning so they don't have any routines yet. It's very depressing. I miss Nala and Rocco so much. They really kept me moving and going. Now I might need to get some Liporexall just so I don't gain even more weight. Well, enough moping around. I have to get moving. I think I'll go for a walk it's a beautiful day.

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