First week of

is done. This is going to go fast, I can see this already. As an aside, this is my fist summer off since I started teaching. I have almost always taught summer school, and would have this year most likely because we always needed the money. The one summer I didn't teach summer school, I was freaking out over money because the crazy nun had fired me and I didn't know how we were going to survive until the new job started. Then last summer I didn't work, but I was orchestrating a trans-Pacific move and it was far more stressful than working. So this summer school because we are not broke... no big move because we live in an amazing house in a nice there is nothing to do but relax. How nice. I have been working on AP Biology, it's not going as well as I would like and I'm not sure exactly why, but I am making progress. But that's not what I want to write about today...

Initially, I was going to write about budgeting and how bad I am with money, but I realized that is not completely true. I have times when I'm good with money and times when I'm bad with money. So then I realized that money is like everything else in my life, I can do good and stick to a plan for a while but eventually, it falls apart and I fall back into old, lazy habits. So this will not be so much about money as about how to stay on top of things that I need to stay on top of. So how do I do it? I know what I need to do. I make lists, charts, have a planner, etc. Yet I will go along great guns for a while and then suddenly I forget. I just forget that I need to check the bank account every day. I forget that I wanted to put some money away. I just forget. I've tried habit trackers in my planner - which sits on my desk here and I can't help but look at every single time I'm on the computer. So what do I need to do? I honestly don't know how people keep track of all the things in their lives all the time. How do they do it? What do I need to do to keep all the things in my life in order? I'm really at a bit of a loss. As I think about it though, I tend to avoid doing things like checking the bank account when I know I've been spending too much or I know the balance is getting low. So it's not so much that I am forgetting, it is more a matter of avoiding. Hmmmm.... Interesting. So how do I avoid this? I am not perfect so I can't imagine that I'll never spend more than I plan to ever again. That's just unrealistic. I really did best when I had my own spending money. Maybe I should put some money into my account and just use that for spending when I get the urge. Hmmm.... that way I won't negatively impact the family finances. That may be an option. If I just don't use the family account for my spending, that would help. So, what I've been doing is not working, therefore I have to change what I'm doing. Simple as that. Well, I haven't really solved anything but I do have some ideas. That is the best thing about this blog. I know I could talk to people, but sometimes I need to work it through myself, because if I don't understand the why or how I will never change things.

In other news, the teachers' group I belong to is releasing some stuff tomorrow to help us get through the summer. I'm really looking forward to that and will close here and rest tonight so I can work hard tomorrow :)

The next day: so I've thought about this stuff all day and I've decided that I just have to do it. I have to make certain things completely non-negotiable and I just have to do them. Kind of like brushing my teeth or showering. I just have to do these things and I don't really think about them. So I set up my planner for next week and I put in another habit tracker. I will do every thing every night before bed. That is all. I will stay on top of every thing and I will make it a habit. That's it. Now, off to bed.


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