21 August 2010

Seriously, who knew???

Monday night I started working out at the new fitness center near my house.  The way their schedule is set up I can do cardio Monday, Wednesday, Friday and strength on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.  The workouts are about an hour long and I sweat buckets in both of them.  It's absolutely perfect.  I have gone every night this week, except Wednesday because of open house, and I am already starting to feel awesome.  Working out is absolutely fabulous but there are benefits to it that I forget.  For example, when I work out regularly I don't crave junk.  My body wants good, wholesome food to refuel and rebuild.  I also have more energy.  I was thinking that I was having trouble sleeping when I may actually be increasing my energy levels.  Also, I just feel better in my skin.  I don't know how to explain it other than that.  It's not like I've lost a ton of weight in a week but I feel awesome.  But I did see a number on the scale I haven't seen in a few months - 184.8 - so that's awesome.

So the truth of the matter is I don't deal well with emotions - I just don't.  Probably what attracted me to science and math. The other night when I had that revelation while working out - that I am fat - it was like the sky cleared and I could finally see. All the previous times I've been successful at weight loss it's always been with that matter of fact attitude - I need to lose weight! That's it. No emotions, no crying why am I fat, no whining, just doing. I guess it really has to do with not focusing on the negative, only the positive.  Instead of thinking why can't I lose weight, I think if I do A, B, and C I will get into better shape and eventually lose weight.  So it's a focus on the process not the outcome. Whatever it is, the bottom line is that it is working.  This morning I am down 3 lbs from where I started the week.  I feel incredible and I have energy to spare.

Now today is going to be incredibly busy.  I have to go workout this morning. Then I have to get my haircut - this lady who does the best job on my hair only works 3 days a week and today is one of them.  I also have a pile of grading to do and I mean a pile.  Then I promised a neighbor I'd help them pick out baby shower invitations, they are throwing a surprise shower for a mutual friend. Finally, a lady is bringing a bird over for me to sit for 10 days while she goes to the mainland for some medical treatment.Hubby is working tonight so there's  no dog walk in the plans.  Tomorrow should be much calmer and more relaxed - hopefully....

18 August 2010

I am fat

That is not a derogatory comment or a statement made to put myself down, it is a statement of fact.  I am a scientist and if I saw an animal in my shape I would say that animal was fat so I am saying I am fat.  But that's good, because as a scientist I have a very logical mind and if I know a situation exists I can change it.  I know I am fat and therefore that can be changed.  When I attach emotions to my weight is when things start getting ugly. To me it's like saying I am tired or I am hungry, it's just a condition that can be changed.  And I plan on changing it. 

On Monday night I went to the BodyAttack class at Mana Fitness and Oh My God!!!  It durn near killed me.  Class is supposed to be an hour long but, as I was the only student, when I was ready to collapse at 30 minutes we called it a day.  I have not worked up such a huge bucket of sweat in a long, long time.  I was breathing hard and deep and pouring sweat.  It was awesome.  I went back last night and did the BodyPump class which is a full body strength session.  I could feel my muscles quivering at the end and today???  Forget about it, I am sore all over.  I love it!!!!  I can't go tonight because it's open house at school but I will be back tomorrow night. I love this workout. 

Working out there is what lead to the statement above.  They have mirrors all along the wall you face and you can't help but look at yourself.  When you have weight issues you also have mental issues in that you don't always see your body as it really is.  When I was my heaviest I didn't think I was that fat and, without realizing it, avoided mirrors.  When I lost 75 lbs it took me a long time to connect my mental image with the one in the mirror.  I would see myself in a mirror and not recognize myself immediately. It took a long time for my head to realize I was skinny.  Well, as I've gained weight recently my mental image has stayed skinny.  I knew I had gained about 15 lbs but I never changed the mental image in my head.  Working out there and looking in the mirrors changed the mental image and led me to the conclusion that I am fat.  No emotions, no whining, no gnashing of teeth, just a simple fact.  I am fat and it's time to change that..

15 August 2010

Continuing yesterday

After my post I showered, ate breakfast and then needed to go get my glasses adjusted. Since it was just at the mall I decided to walk over - what a good decision. As I'm walking I notice a sign I haven't seen before - Mana Fitness Studio - huh???? So I go to take a closer look. There is only a sign and a flyer taped to the window but I notice people inside so I open the door. One of the ladies comes over and we start talking. Turns out they have been open less than a week and they teach Les Mills classes. Sweet!!! They have classes at 5:30 and 6:30 at night and on Saturday mornings. I am stoked. I am going on Monday to the BodyAttack class - I have a free pass - and if I like it I'm buying a membership. It is so close to my house, 15 minutes to walk and about 3 minutes to drive - 5 if I hit a light.

There are times when the universe or god or whatever you want to call it speaks to you. I really, really believe that. I also believe that sometimes things are thrown in our way that we are supposed to do. I think this is one of those things. I had just decided to get back into weights and serious cardio again. I decided on the spur of the moment to walk to the mall and I decided at the last minute to go the way I did. If any of these things hadn't happened I would not have found this place. I'm really, really excited about it.  I think it will be just the thing I need to get me going again.  Also, although I'm not a 'group' type person, I think have a class will keep me honest for a while.  I know there will come a point where I won't need this anymore, but right now I think it is the perfect thing. I am excited......

Monsoon season has arrived

and we got our first rain yesterday. Actually, it's still raining a little this morning. It wasn't a lot of rain, but it was rain....