12 January 2022

And it's Wednesday......

 The weeks go so fast but the days are slow. It's weird. Today it's just a brain dump since I have nothing to write about. 

The Happy Back Challenge day 2 was hard. They had a move I couldn't do. Well, I could do it but not well. We had to lay on our stomach, hold on to some blocks at chest level, and lift the blocks. That means squeezing your back and shoulder blades. I could barely get the blocks off the floor. Weird. 

The other day I was on the floor and was unsure how to get up. I don't like that feeling and that alone is a good reason to work out regularly. But on top of that, I'm feeling a little unsteady on my legs, especially in the morning. If I have to get up in the middle of the night, I'm very shaky on my feet. None of this I like. None. Of. It. This right here is more than enough reason to keep moving and to work out. I hate it. I want to be able to jump up out of a chair and walk without thinking about it. I want to sit on the floor and get up without worrying about how I will do it. This is complete Bullsh*t and it needs to end now. 

I'm really kind of over my DMSC membership. Things happen when and where you need them but they usually run their course. I'm wondering if this has run it's course for me. I still listen to the weekly focus and podcast every week, but I rarely do the assignments - mostly because I just forget. The weekly focuses are good, but I try to work on everything all the time. The group has died since he started Alliance and I'm just not getting much out of it anymore. I'm only paying $20 a month though so I keep it hoping things will change. He is doing a revitalization thing next week where he says it will revitalize us and the group. So we'll see. I started this mindful journey long before I found him and while he helped I think I may need to move on without him. Also, some of the things he says no longer resonate with me. He has made a couple of comments that just don't ring true in my ears and makes me want to not listen to him. Oh well, I'll give it a little bit longer and see how it goes.  I may never quit, but I may pull away. 

That's about it. My time is up and I need to get ready for work. 

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